Zahid's Random Thoughts ...

A Tribute to H.H. Dr. Syedna Mohammed Burahanuddin (tus)

2011-03-20T21:26:00.006-05:00

A great week for Daudi Bohras all over the world, as we celebrate the 100th Birthday of our beloved spritual leader and father, Dr. Syedna Bohammed Burhanuddin (tus).

My humble effort to pay tribute to a great personality ...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EguaAF8m86U

When the grief strikes …

2010-08-14T22:16:00.003-05:00

A passenger plane has crashed in bad weather in the hills somewhere. All 152 passengers died. No survivors!

News like this are not uncommon. You feel sad about the deceased and their families and move on. Except that in this case the crash occurred at Margalla Hills near Islamabad, Pakistan on July 28, 2010. And one of the passengers was my brother, Ali Akber. Not just any brother, but my very dear baby brother, the youngest of eight siblings. Now that hurts! In fact to say that it hurts is an understatement of grand proportion.

They say that time is a great healer. However, I always wondered why the loved ones of the people who die in a tragedy are not able to get over it and move on even after many years. A case in point is the Air India flight from Montreal to Mumbay which was blown up off Irish coast in a terrorism act in 1985. Recently, the families of the victims marked the 25th anniversary of this tragedy by holding ceremonies in Ireland, Canada and India. When I saw them speaking on television I could not understand at that time why there still was so much pain and anger in their voice and on their faces even after such a long time. Now I understand.

How does one cope with a grief like this? I have been grappling with this question for the last two weeks. Your faith and your belief system play a key role at such a time. And that is what I am counting on. It has helped that the holy month of Ramadan started soon after this tragedy. This Ramadan I have a lot to reflect upon the life and its fragility. One phone call in the middle of the night can change every thing in your life.

Day and night I think of you
How can all this be true?
I still can't believe you're really gone
Even though a week has now bygone
Just the thought of you makes me cry
I never even got the chance to say goodbye
All I've left now is a memory lane
Until some day we meet again!

Father's Day -- Without a Father

2009-06-23T20:06:00.007-05:00

Last Sunday was the Fathers Day and this time I did not have a father to call and wish him. It finally dawned on me that this day is now meant for me. Although I have been a father for the last two decades, and the kids do their best every year to mark the occasion, it always seemed that, at least in my family, it was reserved for my dad alone. Any thought of my sharing the day would have been disrespectful to him.

So this Father's day has a new meaning for me. Instead of the ritual wishing to Dad, this year I am reflecting on his life and times ...

US shows its might in Pakistan

2009-04-12T14:20:00.006-05:00

Pakistan may be downtrodden but its Prime Minister still commands due respect from foreign dignitaries, including U.S. Special Envoy Richard Holbrooke and Admiral Mike Molin. One can only imagine what they would do for President Zardari!!!

Obama comes to Ottawa

2009-02-15T10:39:00.012-05:00

President-in-Chief Obama is coming to my town, Ottawa, on his first foreign visit as the US President this Thursday, Feb 19, 2009. Canada is a safe place for any new US president for his first visit to get his feet wet (in February though, he will only find ice!). Since he is new to Canada, here is a primer on Canada for President Obama.

You will be received at the airport by a white portly man and an elegant looking black lady. No, they are not a couple. So don't greet her as "how do you do, Mrs. Harper?" She is Michaëlle Jean, our Governor General. You may want to practice pronouncing her name with those two funny dots in there. You and she have something in common. No, I am not referring to the colour of skin. Like you she is also Commander-in-Chief -- of Canadian military. Sorry to rain on your parade this way, however Canada had a C-in-C who is not only a black but also a woman long before they started asking the questions: is America ready for a black President? Is America ready for a woman as a President? She is of Haitian decent so you may want to impress her with a few words of their language. Just Google for that on your blackberry.

The white guy is our PM, Stephen Harper. Don't call him Stevie or even Steve. He does not like that. He likes to be called The Right Honourable Stephen Harper. Right, because he is the leader of the right-wing conservative party. To answer your Republican friends back home, you may find it useful to know that this conservative PM, who was also the head of a tax payers advocacy group not too long ago, after inheriting huge budget surpluses from the previous Liberal governments has now agreed to run $40 billion deficit.

When you hear about the meltdown in Ottawa, it does not mean the stock markets have crashed. It means the snow is melting due to unusually warm weather in the +2 to -5 degrees range. That's right, that is the definition of warm weather here.

Anyway, Welcome to Ottawa! Our hands might feel cold on handshake but our hearts are warm in welcoming you here!

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Change We Can Believe In ...

2009-01-31T21:48:00.002-05:00

Mubarak to Barack!

2009-01-20T14:02:00.005-05:00

Today, Barack Hussein Obama became the 44th President of the United States of America and the first President of the planet earth. There is no precedent for someone to assume this awesome responsibility with so much support domestically as well as internationally.

It was a moving ceremony in Washington, D.C. When asked for his reaction, the out-going President Bush said he was touched by the scenes of millions of people who came there to say goodbye to him. He also disclosed that he is retiring in Texas where he will spend his time searching on Google Earth to find WMD in Iraq.

VP Dick Cheney, on the other hand, is expected to apply for disability pension tomorrow!

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Growing-up

2009-01-11T11:20:00.015-05:00

When does one really grow-up?

Ask this simple question and you will get a variety of answers, such as:
When one turns 18 or 21.
When one reaches the legal age of majority.
when one completes schooling.
When one marries.
When one becomes a parent.
...

I think I've found the answer.

I recently lost my father, more than 20 years after I first lost my mother. At 93, his departure was not unexpected, yet there is no diminishing of grief and sorrow in the family. Although my father was inactive for the last few years, yet his just being there as a family elder was a source of comfort and inspiration for all of us - his children, grand-children and great grand-children. It is the first time in my life that I am without that loving, caring, protective parental cover over me. And now, when I am in my 50s, married for over 25 years, two adult children, over the peak of my career, it finally dawned on me that I have now grown-up!

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A Lesson in Democracy

2008-07-23T18:37:00.009-05:00

Yesterday, the Indian government survived a critical vote of confidence in the parliament on the nuclear pact with the United States. The vote was so close that political parties pulled all stops to ensure all their members show up for the vote. Some members were wheeled-in from their hospital beds. Some others were granted day pass from the jail to be able to exercise their democratic right to cast their vote and then return back to their cell (this is absolutely true!).

There are unconfirmed reports that efforts were made to revive recently deceased MPs and get their voices heard and their vote counted. Arrangements were also made to keep some of the MPs awake who usually take a nap in the House, by giving occasional buz to their Black Berries or cell phones, so that they don't miss the vote.

There were allegations of bribes, threats, blackmails, defections, etc from all sides. Opposition members brought two duffel bags full of cash into the assembly building alleging the prime minister's allies had attempted to buy votes with the money.

When asked how many billions of rupees were offered as bribes, the Indian Prime Minister responded in sign language.

After the vote Prime Minister Manmohan Singh declared, "This vote gives a clear message to the world that India's head and heart are sound and India is prepared to take its rightful place in the comity of nations." One might have difficulty accepting the first part of this statement, however Mr. Singh is absolutely right about the second part. India is now a proud member of the club which includes countries like Canada, Italy and Israel where similar democratic traditions were in full display in similar no confidence votes in recent years.

Representatives from Pakistan and Zimbabwe also attended the Parliament session as observers. When asked to comment on all the bru ha ha surrounding the vote, the Pakistani rep gave a one word response - "Amateurs!" "India is making good progress to finally becoming a truly democratic country," declared the Zimbabwe rep.

Long Live Democracy!

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It ain't over 'til it's over!

2008-05-28T17:21:00.007-05:00

Should Senator Hillary Clinton quit now that Senator Obama has insurmountable lead in delegate support?

Why should she? Whatever happened to the democratic process where every vote counts? The race is so close that it is only right that this campaign take its natural course through the remaining States and each and every vote is counted before a winner is declared.

Hillary Clinton has already achieved something unprecedented - mount a serious attempt to become the first female President of the only super power. She has broken the barrier for women by effectively neutralizing the female angle of her candidancy. Obama on the other hand has not quite done the same for African Americans. His support has come due to his personal charisma and popularity. Another African American candidate in future will not necessarily get the same reception from the white America.

The sad result of this campaign though is that it will be a long time before another woman mounts a serious campaign for presidency. The long primary campaign in effect puts female candidates at a disadvantage as men usually have a clear advantage in physical stamina over women.

It is time to reform the electoral process and create a level playing field for all potential candidates.

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Hajj - The Mother of All Pilgrimages

2008-03-30T16:11:00.010-05:00

It's been the most humbling and fascinating experience performing Hajj last December. I have been struggling to find a way to capture this unique experience in words but have not been able to do so yet.

As they say, a picture is worth thousand words, so here is the pictorial story of my Hajj.

Hajj 1428 Pictures

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President Obama?

2007-02-11T21:10:00.000-05:00

Is America ready for a President who is not white, and not black either? Senator Barack Obama, who announced his candidacy for the Democratic Party nomination yesterday, has forced people to ask this intriguing question. Obama is a product of a Kenyan immigrant father and white mother from Wichita, Kansas. His father left the family and returned to Kenya when Obama was only two years old. Does this make Obama a Black American? He is not a descendant of a slave from West Africa to qualify as a Black American. In fact, he is more white than Michael Jackson.

Why should it matter whether someone is white or black to be elected as the President? Luckily for Obama, it does matter. White Americans may find enough white in him to vote for him and for blacks, he is one of them. And if he wins, it will be a national celebration on the streets of Nairobi as "their son" will become the President and Commander-in-Chief of the only superpower in the world. One more national holiday for Kenyans!

If this Black n White debate was not enough then there is another twist in this fascinating story. Obama's middle name is Hussein. That's right, Barack Hussein Obama! Now all the Muslims will also jump on his bandwagon. Sorry, Hillary. Looks like Obama has all bases covered.

It will be the first time in the U.S. history that they will have a President whose name rhymes with their enemy #1 of the day. Consider the recent Presidents and their chief nemesis of the day:

Carter vs Ayatollah - no rhyming at all!
Reagan vs Qaddafi, Gaddaphi, Khaddafi (all three of them)
Bush Sr vs Saddam
Clinton vs Gingrich?
Bush Jr vs Saddam (part 2)
and now ...
Obama vs Osama - now we are talking! and rhyming!

There could be interesting exchanges between the two.

Obama to Osama: Yo mama so stupid she hears it's chilly outside so she gets a bowl.
Osama: Hey, dude. Chill. Come, share with me my favourite food, Shawarma.
Obama: Sorry, I am too busy. I go to Alabama.
Osama: Why in Iraq you make all this Hangama?
Obama to Osama: I'll tell you in a minute. First, come out of the hole, if you are a Mardana.

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Little Mosque on the Prairie

2007-01-14T16:43:00.000-05:00

The TV show everyone is talking about, Little Mosque on the Prairie, the new CBC comedy about Muslims living in a small prairie town, is created by Zarqa Nawaz, a Canadian of Pakistani origin.

You can watch the first episode at the YouTube. Here are the links - its uploaded in 4 parts, the show starts at 2 minutes in the first part.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tu2-lXDe2to&mode=related&search=
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gmSAYyTKD0o&mode=related&search=
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S4SH-vxBZEo&mode=related&search=
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RsOH7Kmmfrs&mode=related&search=
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Miracles, Wars, and Politics

2007-01-14T10:00:00.006-05:00

[I don't normally reproduce other people's work here, however this is an exception. This philosophical and thought-provoking essay from a Pakistani Professor resonates with my own thoughts on the subject as well.]

Miracles, Wars, and Politics

By Pervez Hoodbhoy; September 16, 2004

On the morning of the first Gulf War (1991), having just heard the news of the US attack on Baghdad, I walked into my office in the physics department in a state of numbness and depression. Mass death and devastation would surely follow. I was dismayed, but not surprised, to discover my PhD student, a militant activist of the Jamaat-i-Islami's student wing in Islamabad, in a state of euphoria. Islam's victory, he said, is inevitable because God is on our side and the Americans cannot survive without alcohol and women. He reasoned that neither would be available in Iraq, and happily concluded that the Americans were doomed. Then he reverentially closed his eyes and thrice repeated "Inshallah" (if Allah so wills).

Two weeks later, after the rout of Saddam's army and 70,000 dead Iraqis, I reminded him of his predictions. He stumbled an explanation but soon gave up. Years later, soon after earning a reasonably good doctorate in quantum field theory and elementary particles, he quit academia and put his considerable physics skills to use in a very different direction. Today he heads a department that deals with missile guidance systems in a defense organization that makes nuclear weapons and precision missiles.

Belief in miracles, and that one’s prayers can persuade divine intervention in matters of the physical world, is an integral part of most cultures and beliefs. In Pakistan today - where the bulk of the population has been through the Islamized education initiated by General Zia-ul-Haq in the1980's - supernatural intervention is widely held responsible for natural calamities and diseases, car accidents and plane crashes, acquiring or losing personal wealth, success or failure in examinations, or determining matters of love and matrimony. In Pakistan no aircraft - whether of Pakistan International Airlines or a private carrier registered in Pakistan – can take off until appropriate prayers are recited. Wars certainly cannot be won without Allah's help, but He has also been given the task of winning cricket matches for Pakistan.

The last mentioned is serious business, lest anyone think otherwise. And it makes the Almighty's job a particularly difficult one whenever there are Muslims playing on the other sides' team. Hafizur Rahman, an astute observer of Pakistani cricket, recalls that when the Pakistan team won a test match in South Africa some years ago, to the amazement of the spectators, all team members prostrated them selves on the cricket ground to thank Allah. But this was a minor event compared to the national frenzy induced by the World Cup in Australia; the erstwhile prime minister, Benazir Bhutto, called upon the entire nation to pray for a final win. Even the clergy, who normally condemn cricket as frivolous entertainment, joined in the hysteria. When Pakistan lost the match, Chaudhry Shujaat Hussain, who became prime minister in 2004, had an interesting explanation. In his view, "the PTV (Pakistan Television) song that boasted that we would win, did not contain the word Inshallah. That is why we lost."

Drought may not be as important a matter as cricket, but last week the government of Pakistan issued a warning - the rivers are running dry, water reservoirs are nearing the danger mark, and hydro-electricity production may soon be discontinued. Even as I type this paragraph on a Friday afternoon, millions of the faithful in mosques across Pakistan are obeying the government's call for 'namaz-i-istisqa' (prayers for rain). Next year - instead of building dams, lining canals, embarking on water conservancy strategies, or doing something to control Pakistan's exploding population -the government will presumably put the pressure on God again by summoning the masses.

Will It Rain If You Pray?

The history of myths and miracles in pre-Reformation Christianity, of their growth in earlier phases, and their decline under Renaissance thinking, is an extremely interesting and relevant subject for those who wish to understand the state of science and society in Muslim countries today. The fundamental question then was, and remains today, the following: does God suspend the laws of physics in response to the actions of human beings (in which case miracles can happen)? Or has God turned over the day-to-day matters of running the universe to the laws of physics that he put into place at the beginning (in this case miracles cannot happen)?

Following the lead of European Renaissance thinkers, Muslim reformers of the 19th century, particularly Syed Ahmad Khan, argued that miracles – as commonly understood - cannot and do not happen. As a religious scholar who wrote a tafseer (interpretation) of the Qur'an, Syed Ahmad Khan insisted that the miracles mentioned in the Qur'an must be understood in broad allegorical terms rather than literally. Following the Mutazillite tradition of early Islam he, together with various 19th century Arab modernists, insisted on an interpretation of the Qur'an that was in conformity with the observed truths of science, thereby doing away with such commonly held beliefs as the Noah's Great Flood and Adam's descent from heaven.

It was a risky proposition that brought them closer to modern scientific thought, on the one hand, and severe condemnation from the orthodox of those times. But those 19th century battles appear to be forgotten today. Looking at these old writings, one wonders how those Muslim thinkers dared to engage so boldly in such controversial matters. But they did, and today we dare not. This is an indication of the profound philosophical and intellectual regression of the Muslim world over the last two centuries.

My discussion in a recent seminar in Lahore of the history of miracles, cause-and-effect in ancient Islam (there was greater acceptance then than today!), and description of rainfall as a physical process that cannot be influenced by prayer, drew an angry reaction from a professor at an elite university. Subsequently, an email was circulated to the entire student body and beyond, an excerpt of which is reproduced below:

The fact that rainfall sometimes is caused in response to prayers is a matter of human experience. Although I cannot narrate an incident directly, I know [this] from the observations of people who would not exaggerate. The problem is that Dr Hoodbhoy has narrowed down his mind to be influenced by only those facts that could be explained by the cause-and-effect relationship. That's a classic example of academic prejudice. Our world is not running on the principle of a causal relationship. It is running the way it is being run by its Master. Man has discovered that, generally speaking, the physical phenomena of our world follow the principle of cause-and-effect. However, that may not always happen, because the One who is running it has never committed Himself to stick to that principle.

I responded with the following points:

Prof. X admits that he has never personally witnessed rain fall in consequence to prayers, but confidently states that this is ‘a matter of human experience’ because he thinks some others have seen unusual things happen. Well, there are people who are willing to swear on oath that they have seen Elvis's ghost. Others claim that they have seen UFOs, horned beasts, apparitions, the dead arise, etc. Without disputing that some of these people might be sincere and honest, I must emphasize that science cannot agree to this methodology. There is no limit to the power of people’s imagination. Unless these mysterious events are recorded on camera, we cannot accept them as factual occurrences.

Rain is a physical process (evaporation, cloud formation, nucleation, and condensation). It is complicated, because the atmospheric motion of gases needs many variables for a proper description. However, it obeys exactly the same physical laws as deduced by looking at gases in a cylinder, falling bodies, and so forth. Personally I would be most interested to know whether prayers can also cause the reversal of much simpler kinds of physical processes. For example, can a stone be made to fall upward instead of downward? Or can heat be made to flow from a cold body to a hot body by appropriate spiritual prompting? If prayers can cause rain to fall from a blue sky, then all physics and all science deserves to be trashed.

I am afraid that the track record for Prof. X's point of view on rain is not very good. Saudi Arabia remains a desert in spite of its evident holiness, and the poor peasants of Sind have a terrible time with drought in spite of their simplicity and piety. Geography, not earnestness of prayer, appears to be the determining factor.

Confidence in the cause-and-effect relationship is indeed the very foundation of science and, as a scientist, I fully stand by it. Press the letter 'T' on your keyboard and the same letter appears on the screen; step on the accelerator and your car accelerates; jump out of a window and you get hurt; put your hand on a stove and you get burnt. Those who doubt cause-and-effect do so at great personal peril.

Prof. X is correct in saying that many different people (not just Muslims alone) believe they can influence physical events through persuading a divine authority. Indeed, in the specific context of rain-making, we have several examples. Red Indians had their very elaborate dances to please the Rain God; people of the African bush tribes beat drums and chant; and orthodox Hindus plead with Ram through spectacular 'yagnas' with hundreds of thousands of the faithful. Their methods seem a little odd to me, but I wonder if Prof. X wishes to accord them respect and legitimacy.

Why Science Does Matter

Specious theological beliefs, together with reliance on miracles and superstitions, have acted as a brake on social progress and often rendered peoples vulnerable to the depredations of science-based imperialism. Muslims have been the worst sufferers. Suffocated by Western colonizers on the one hand, and the weight of tradition on the other, 19th century Muslim modernizers across the Muslim world sought new ways to revive their societies. Reconciling Islamic theology with science was an important challenge because, for these pioneering individuals, science was the key instrument for promoting rational thinking on political and social matters. Mohammed Abduh, Rashid Rida, Jamaluddin Afghani, Syed Ameer Ali, Syed Ahmad Khan, and other intellectuals, sought to deal with issues such as polygamy and purdah in Islam, the question of slavery, the permissibility of interest, etc. Their success - limited as it was - was important in eventually creating a Large Muslim elite that broke with traditional norms and forms of social behavior.

But today Islam is once again regressing into pre-scientific thinking and behavior - thousands of websites on science and Islam promote the most egregious examples of scientific crackpotism. But Muslims are not alone. A similar regression is evident on a global scale with anti-scientific thinking neatly dovetailing with, and providing justification for, aggressive forms of social and political behavior.

This primitivism is starkly evident in George Bush's America which promotes Creationism and Christian notions of the human fetus. According to the National Science Foundation's biennial report (April 2002) on the state of science understanding: 30% of adult Americans believe that UFOs are space vehicles from other civilizations; 60% believe in ESP; 40% think that astrology is scientific; 32% believe in lucky numbers; 70% accept magnetic therapy as scientific; and 88% accept alternative medicine. This vast base of ignorance allows for the rise of American neo-conservatism and the blueprint for the New American Century; preparations for Armageddon; and for General Boykin in Somalia to say "my God is bigger than theirs".

In India, superstitious beliefs were actively cultivated by the BJP and Its allies. These included the creation of astrology departments, promotion of "Vedic" mathematics and cosmology, and a revamping of the school curricula. Mass hysteria - promoted by orthodox Hindus - accompanied the sighting of the "Monkey Man", followed by Muhnochwa the "Face Scratcher", and then the elephant-like Lord Ganesh's alleged drinking of milk. Charged with the notion of Hindu superiority, and of wild notions that Hindu deities had been born under certain mosques, Hindutva forces organized the razing of mosques and tombs, and massacred Muslims and Christians.

In Israel, orthodox Jews have been the pillars of a state that is built on the notion of religious exclusion. Israel's drives for total military superiority, and a strong tradition of Jewish secularism, have so far kept the orthodox at bay. But it is unclear whether this can persist indefinitely. For example, certain American cattle tycoons have for years been working with Israeli counterparts to try and breed a pure red heifer in Israel, which, by their interpretation of chapter 19 of the Book of Numbers, will signal the coming of the building of the Third Temple. If they were to succeed, it could intensify the already strong movement within Israel to rebuild the Temple, the event of which would ignite the Middle East, as any new Temple must be built on the Temple Mount current home of the Dome of The Rock, a Muslim holy site.

Zealots of all persuasions - Muslim, Hindu, Christian, and Jewish - Welcome attacks on science and reason. Social constructivists, postmodernists, and even some feminists, have unwittingly given them yet more ammunition by inventing specious arguments. Improvement of the human condition demands a return to critical reasoning and scientific analysis, a rejection of cultural relativism, and willingness to accept still-evolving universal norms of ethics and human behavior.

The author is professor of physics at Quaid-e-Azam University, Islamabad, Pakistan.

Guess who is going Metric!

2007-01-13T19:59:00.000-05:00

What do Burma, Liberia and the United States of America have in common? These are the only three countries which still measure the distance in miles!!!

With key allies like Burma and Liberia the U.S. has so far maintained its bulwark against the tide of the Metric system (or SI) of weights and measures. But, not for long. This strategic allinace seems to be crumbling. NASA has recently decided to fly the next moon mission entirely in metric. Foot, pound and gallon will be replaced by meter, kilogram, and litre. This was inevitable, as all other countries involved in space missions work in Metric. This leaves any space experts in Burma and Liberia on their own! What a terrible way to end this long time alliance. This may be the first time that the U.S. is actually following rather than leading the rest of the world in the scientific arena.

Interestingly, the foot was based on the size of the foot of one of the kings of England. That is no way to run a space program, based on a dead king's shoe size!

It will be a long time before we see full metricanization of the U.S. When asked why the U.S. is still resisting the conversion to the metric system, a top U.S. administration official said, "we are not dragging our feet. We are moving towards metric inch-by-inch."

For NASA though, it would mean a lot more km to fly to the moon than they were used to in miles (1 mile = 1.6 km). And no NASA scientist can now claim "my mile is bigger than your km", the same way as the U.S. General Boykin in Somalia had declared "my God is bigger than theirs".

Another Milestone!

2006-12-28T17:39:00.000-05:00

A marriage is like a marathon with a difference. In a marathon, the objective is to be ahead of your fellow runners. But in a marriage you want to be shoulder-to-shoulder with your partner, not ahead and not behind. And ideally, there would be no finish line. You just keep running until ...

Okay, let me get to the point.

Before this year ends, I'll be marking my 25th wedding anniversary. This has been a remarkable journey. There have been ups and downs, however we both survived. The credit goes to my better-half -- only she could put up for this long with a duffer like me. I've been reflecting on my life for the last few days and wondering where did I go right to be blessed with a beautiful wife, two wonderful kids and scores of family and friends!!!

I thank the Almighty for the many blessings bestowed upon us and look forward to the next 25 years ahead of us, inshaallah.

My advice to young couples who are just starting is to remember this: Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right and the other is husband!

Mil Specs

2006-12-25T15:34:00.000-05:00

How Military Specifications Live for Ever

The U.S. standard railroad gauge (distance between rails) is 4 feet, 8.5 inches. That’s an exceedingly odd number. Why was that gauge used? Because that’s the way they built them in England, and the U.S. railroads were built by English expatriates.

Why did the English people build them like that? Because the first rail lines were built by the same people who built the pre-railroad tramways, and that’s the gauge they used.

Why did “they” use that gauge then? Because the people who built the tramways used the same jigs and tools that they used for building wagons, which used that wheel spacing.

Okay! Why did the wagons use that odd wheel spacing? Well, if they tried to use any other spacing the wagons would break on some of the old, long-distance roads, because that’s the spacing of the old wheel ruts.

So who built these old rutted roads? The first long-distance roads in Europe were built by Imperial Rome for the benefit of their legions. The roads have been used ever since. And the ruts? The initial ruts which everyone else had to match for fear of destroying their wagons were first made by Roman war chariots. Since the chariots were made for or by Imperial Rome, they were all alike in the matter of wheel spacing.

Thus, we have the answer to the original question. The United States standard railroad gauge of 4 feet, 8.5 inches derives from the original specification (military spec)for an Imperial Roman war chariot. Military specs and bureaucracies live forever.

So, the next time you are handed a specification and wonder what horse’s ass came up with it, you may be exactly right. The Imperial Roman chariots were made to be just wide enough to accommodate the back ends of two war horses.

O Canada!

2006-12-23T13:39:00.000-05:00

Shared with friends in October 2003 ...

O Canada!

The Pope and I have something in common. No, it is not the
size of the crowds John Paul and I attract. It is the fact
that we both are celebrating 25th anniversaries this month.
He just celebrated his 25 years on the throne and this week
I am celebrating my 25 years in Canada.

Hard to imagine that it was 25 years ago that I landed at
Toronto airport to start a new life. It was October 31,
1978. The first thing I noticed that evening was weird
looking people on the street going door to door. I thought,
great! I'll fit in here nicely. My hopes were dashed as I
learnt later that these were normal people wearing masks and
costumes as part of some ancient annual ritual to give economic
boost to the candy industry.

The first few years were interesting when I was struggling
to cope with the weather, the accent, both Canadian (eh?)
and mine (unh?), upside down light switches, buying three
bottles of coke every time there was a sale with limit of
three per customer, even though I did not actually need any.
These marketing people really know how to work on the new
comers.

Then there was this constant correcting of Canadian people
that I am not an Indian and then trying to explain them the
perennial animosity between India and Pakistan. It was
during one such occasion that a colleague of mine said, "the
fighting between India and Pakistan over Kashmir is like two
bald men fighting for a comb!!!"

I started out with nothing and still have most of it.
Actually after 25 years, I am quite content with what I have
(or don't have) in terms of health, wealth, happiness,
career, life, and hair on my head, etc. I have though
noticed a disturbing trend in recent years. Not a day goes
by when I am not reminded, through my e-mail in-box, about
my anatomical inadequacies. Then they offer me low cost
mail-order degrees and diplomas as if this is exactly why I
did not get that CEO job. If this was not enough, they also
offer me to solve all my debt and financial problems. Come
to think of it, going through my inbox is as depressing as
listening to Donald Rumsfeld.

My only regret is that Canadians did not recognize my full
potential. The only people who know my real worth are
Nigerians. They trust me with their millions more than Bank
of Montreal will do with their pen, which they tightly
secure with a chain!!!

Am I wiser after all these years? Well, I found that it is
easier to get older than it is to get wiser. And when I
finally got my head together, now my body is falling apart!

103 Percent

2006-12-10T12:31:00.001-05:00

Ever wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100%?

We have all been to those meetings where someone wants over 100%. How about achieving 103%? Here's a little math that might prove helpful.

What makes life 100%?

If:
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

is represented as:
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26.

Then:

K N O W L E D G E
11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5 = 96%

H A R D W O R K
8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 = 98%

But,

A T T I T U D E
1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5 = 100%

And,

B U L L S H I T
2+21+12+12+19+8+9+20 = 103%

So, it stands to reason that hard work and knowledge will get you close, attitude will get you there, and bullshit will put you over the top!!!

Why do I have this blog?

2006-11-18T17:16:00.000-05:00

The short answer is: Just because!!!

This is where I'll be mumbling to myself or will be arguing with me, I, myself and moi ... all of them.

So stay tuned and drop by whenever you can and feel free to share with me what ever is on your mind.